FAILED DREAMS — by Steve Nadis
I blew it again last night, in my dream. There I was behind enemy lines–the enemy being the Nazis, who were always the bad guys when I was a kid, long before we knew about Al Quaeda–trying to do in those evildoers. A group of us needed to climb down a mountain and I forgot how to tie a bowline. I asked a friend who, disgusted by my ineptitude, just took off down the rocky face, leaving me standing there, alone and ineffectual, without harming the Nazi cause in the slightest. I woke up feeling worthless, though grateful that my father’s generation had taken care of a job I apparently was not up to.
Posted by
at
14:47:44
Partisan comes out of the hole, around the tree, fires at Nazis, goes back in the hole.
P.S. It must be your Nazis that keep leaking into my dreasm. Could you please tell them to stop chasing me?
I’ll be sure to talk to them next nightmare. The trouble is, my Nazis seem to have a mind of their own.
They can’t be Nazis, then. Nazis only follow orders. They never think for themselves. Unless…unless these are "Super Nazis"! Shit! (As your daughter would say.) We’re all screwed! Quick–everyone practice the bowline knot!
GEEZ, don’t stress me out. I can’t do a bowline under pressure. How is that again–the rabbit goes through the hole…?
I had a dream last night where I was scaling down a cliff to blow up a big gun the Nazi’s had installed in a mountain. But the jerk responsible for my bowline froze up or something because once I left my rock support all I did was fall, screaming the whole way down until I awoke in a cold sweat. Thanks for nothing Snake!
That was me! But I had no idea who the other guy was. Sorry about that, Doc. You made a heck of a scream, by the way. Could have been a great demonstration of the doppler effect for an educational video.
Steve–
I am more confused than before. I see you wrote that you told me to contact The New Yorker. No, you didn’t. You wrote that I contacted The New Yorker–says who? How would you know whether or not I contacted The New Yorker?
I envy you,and i admire your artile very much.