BUG-KILL PHILOSOPHY — by Steve Nadis
I live in an intellectual burg where even the exterminators are philosophers. Earlier today I spent an hour with one such professional, who failed to find a single bug of consequence in my home but dished out enough philosophy to make the inspection well worth the $125 fee. “Does your wife sleep on this side of the bed?” he asked, while inspecting our room for hidden pests. “Yeah, why do you ask?” I replied. “Men always sleep by the door,” he said. “It’s been that way since the Stone Age,” he added, with women and children sleeping in back of the cave–at least according to this expert–while men guarded the entrance.
Although my girls are still young, he warned me what I’ll be in for a decade from now. “All your troubles will have to do with men,” he explained. “You’ll have three women MEN-struating. Plus your wife dealing with MEN-opause. Then you’ll have your own MEN-tal health to deal with. So eventually, all your women problem will actually revolve around men.”
I wrote out the check before he left and suggested that perhaps we’d do the next “inspection” while I lay down on the couch. The way I see it, we all could use a good “debugging” every now and then.
Posted by
at
05:56:45
I think this is probably sexist, thought I can’t put my finger on it. One problem is that menopause and menstruation notwisthstanding, it barely scratches the surface when it comes to the problems caused by men.
Hi Lindsey — good to hear from you again. Sorry if the technical problems kept you away, as they have kept everyone else away, including myself. I didn’t try to make this sexist though I suppose it’s good to be some kind of "ist," just to make things interesting…
I’m with Lindsey on this. I can’t quite put my finger on it though, and there is enough in life that you CAN isolate. At least you had no infestation! Speaking of infestation, perhaps you could send him to your blog to "fog" it. One thing no one needs to work on is the word verification. That mother works when NOTHING else does on your blog. I know because I usually get to try it several times.
Yeah, I agree, this blog has become a real pain. I don’t know why anyone puts up with it, though I’m grateful a few still do.
Very witty, MEN-surable exterminator.
He’s right about the men sleeping by the door (my husband always sleeps on the side nearest the door).
It’s a good thing they [men] got the clobbering the female over the head for mating out of their systems…
Hello FW (I hope you don’t mind my calling you that for the sake of brevity, so that I do not use one more word or syllable than is absolutely, positively necessary), thanks for your note. I agree about the latter–it does seem to be progress when men, by and large, don’t feel compelled to do that (i.e., clobbering, etc.). In light of this social evolutionary development, it’s fair to say this species is coming up in the world–getting to be, what you might call, a real class act.
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