CALL ME SNAKE AT THE MOVIES ——— by Steve Nadis
The first movie we’re reviewing is called “Bright Leaves,” a documentary made by former Cambridge resident Ross McElwee. (I don’t know him personally but have seen him around town; he’s still in the area.) “Bright Leaves,” like all of McElwee’s efforts, is an extremely personal film–the kind of self-reflective work that shows what a blog can strive for but probably never achieve. Calling it a movie about the tobacco industry, and the smoking habit, is like saying Moby Dick is a book about fishing. Three thumbs up for me.
Our second movie is “Dodge City” (1939), starring Erroll Flynn and Olivia de Havilland. The bad guy, played by Bruce Cabot, looks like a younger George W. Bush. And like Bush, Cabot has others (like Cheney and Rove?) to take care of the dirty work for him. This one gets a mixed review from me–one thumb up and one down. I like the way Flynn got his point across while speaking extremely softly. The bad guy stuff seems derivative, especially compared to the real thing we witness every day.
Our third movie is “The Rainmaker” starring Burt Lancaster and Katherine Hepburn–the original based on the N. Richard Nash play, not the remake based on a John Grisham novel. This is a truly great play that has everything–a great romance and a searing look at the American Dream. The movie is perfectly cast: Lancaster overacts as usual, which is perfect for the role of Starbuck. And Hepburn is both moving and convincing as the “old maid.” Three thumbs up for me. I’d give it four thumbs up if I had another.
Our fourth movie is “Batman Begins.” This one, we were promised, was supposed to be different from the usual comic book superhero saga. It was supposed to be deeper, more psychological. The main problem with “Batman Begins” is the begining–a Kung Fu, ninja training tutorial that comes off as ludricous. The movie also suffered from a mediocre middle and a none-too-satisfying ending. All I can say is that I know Spiderman. He’s a good friend of mine. And Batman, you’re no Spiderman. Two thumbs down for me.
That’s our show for tonight. Did I say we’d review five or maybe six movies? Sorry, we’ll have to get around to those next time we meet “At the Movies.” Until then, the balcony is closed. So all you folks sleeping back there, or doing other things I’d rather not mention, will have to take your business outside.
Ah, *sigh* [dreamy eyed Flubberwinkle], Erroll Flynn and Burt Lancaster, the perfect pirates, *sigh*. I’m sure I’ve seen the movies you rated but I’m still too daydreamy to quote. (Note to self: must rewatch foresaid movies.) And Batman? Nah-uh. Spiderman rulez (as young’uns out there say) because yeah, it could happen, I could be bitten by a radioactive spider and yeah,uh-huh, I could be spraying webs all over the city. Batman’s too goth for me. I’m a Fantastic Four & Spiderman gal! No Kal-El for me.
Having subjected myself to Batman Begins, I can vouch for Snake’s review: the movie–except for a few interesting set designs–is terrible. And the most distracting thing about the movie is the way the star (can’t remember his name) looks like his head is being squeezed into a point by his mask, while his jaw bulges out grotesquely. You’d think they would have checked to see if the costume looks good before they started filming.
Also, the plot made no sense. A gang of terrorists tries to wipe out all of humanity in order to make humanity better? Come on! That sounds like something straight out of Cheney’s office.
Once again Gatemouth, you’re right on the mark. How many thumbs down does that make between the two of us? And thank you too FW for your note. I hadn’t heard it put that way before but I agree: Spiderman rulez [sp???].
I haven’t seen any of these movies. How about a REAL oldie - "Duel in the Sun" - Jennifer Jones and Gregory Peck? Now THAT’S a movie!
Hi Windfall — that’s the second time you’ve mentioned "Duel." I guess I’d better see it or you’re likely to keep pestering me. (Just kidding; pester away.)
"rulez". I was borrowing the word from some discussion forums where teenagers use it (probably Greek teenagers, who have crossed out the letter -s when it sounds like a -z). I’ve also seen "I ownz you". I was trying to get into [teen-age] character since we were like- ya know- writing about comics and stuff.
Thanks for the tip. I like to keep up on vernacular.
Man, I guess I need my Alzheimer’s meds. I mentioned that same movie TWICE???? Wow….I do like it.
Don’t worry about getting your head examined, Windfall. The movie is probably that good.
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