THEY MADE ME A CRIMINAL (aka Menace to Society) — by Steve Nadis
Yesterday afternoon, while bicycling through Harvard Square, I was hauled over by a police officer on a motorbike (siren and all) and summarily fined for failing to come to a complete stop at a stop sign. The charge on the ticket read: “operating to endanger.” So, in the course of a day, I’ve gone from law-abiding citizen, who never bothered anybody, to a certified outlaw, third on the “most wanted” list after Osama bin Laden and Whitey Bulger.
For awhile, I was annoyed by the citation. “Don’t they have more important criminals to go after?” I thought. But I’ve since adopted a better attitude and am instead reveling in the exhilaration of it all. This could be the first step in an incipient life of crime. Next you might see me copying the DVDs I get from the video store, in flagrant violation of the warnings conspicuously placed at the start of every feature. After that, who knows? Maybe I’ll take up jaywalking next. From there it’ll be just a short jump to the ultimate crime, as articulated by Emilio Estevez in Repo Man: “Let’s eat sushi and not pay.”
Posted by
at
15:40:33
You do know that criminals are woman bait right? I thought so……
I wouldn’t do it for that. But it would be cool to see my picture in the post office.
Would you do it for a spot on America’s Most Wanted?
Don’t go to the dark side Snake, next thing you’ll be telling us is that you refuse to wear a pants clip.
I’m not sure about the device to which you refer, Doc. If you mean a reflective band, fastened above the ankle, that is highly fashionable among cyclists, I own several and will not part with them.
Whitey Bulger….IS WHO ?
=Z=
As Baretta says, Don’t do the Crime if You Can’t Do the Time (Don’t Do It).
Thanks Neal. I wish more people would quote Baretta. Hi Z, Whitey is a legendary fugitive (at least legendary in Boston), wanted for murder among other charges…
The police officer is probably from NYC where bicycle messengers are a life-threatening hazard.
Bike messengers in Boston rarely kill pedestrians. The intent is strictly to maim.
How much is the fine?
Hi Todd, it’s 20 bucks. Not a princely sum, in fact, and when I think about it, perhaps not enough to drive me to the aforementioned life of crime.
You hang around Harvard Square and you don’t jaywalk??
Who me, jaywalk? Now that’s a serious charge.
zardoz says:
I DIDNT KNOW I WAS IN CAHOOTS
WITH A KNOWN FELON,
OH GOD , MY MOTHER TOLD ME NOT TO RUN
AROUND ,,,,THE INTERNET..
=Z=
You should listen to your mother more often; you can’t be too careful.
Yeah, you look like the kind of guy who is committing crimes all over the Boston area.
Well it’s true I kind of lost it at that stop sign. But I’ve calmed down again and think that crime spree is over.