ASLEEP AT THE WHEEL — by Steve Nadis
I dozed off at my computer while writing about parallel universes–a project I’ve referred to (obliquely) on many occasions. I woke up at 12:30 p.m. and, unfortunately, found myself in the particular universe where I was supposed to pick up my daughter at 12:30. I jumped on my bicycle and raced through Harvard Square, keeping a watchful eye out for the local constabulary, lest I obtain yet another blemish on what had been, until my recent brush with the law, a spotless record. I pedalled so fast, at relativistic speeds, that time slowed down, just as Einstein predicted. I arrived at the preschool (a mile or so away) exactly at 12:30 p.m. and stood in line with the other parents and “caregivers” (“give good care”), patiently waiting for the classroom doors to open. I returned via a wormhole to a separate universe, the one in which I go by the name of Snake. And this is the sorry result.
Posted by
at
18:34:34
How did you get your daughter home? You were on a bicycle… Do you have an infant seat in the back for her? Or did you transport her through the wormhole?
Oh shoot, my daughter! I left her on the other side of the wormhole!
Be careful with light speed there Snake. You might come back and find the rest of us have been dead for a century or two…..granted you wouldn’t have to put up with Bush or Cheney anymore but we’d miss you.
zardoz says:
return to the past,
we’d be dead.
so would the binladens+bushies.
another great one doc.
yeah i could die for that
snake you seem like
decent guy to teach the
youth of the future.
Pick up your litte one
tommorow and on to the future.
BE WELL AND PROSPER.
== Z ==
Thanks Doc & Z! It would be nice to be rid of George & Dick but not worth it. They’re the ones who should go through the wormhole, not me and my homies.
The ability to slow time down comes in handy. Wish I could get that down pat for the weekends.
Great idea, FW. Now if only we could market “time dilation.” I suppose we’d first have to buy the rights from Einstein’s descendents.
Hi Steve(snake).Errrm I am a self educated 50 year old weight trainer who is trying to come to grips with physics(badly)
However if you left at 12.30 and arrived at the school at 12.30 then the law couldnt have
a) seen you unless their eyes/heads moved at the speed of light? Nah its the law they arent that fast.
b) If they had you would have had an alibi
c) again if they had they would have had a complete memory blank about the speeding ticket that you didnt get.
Either way I have just been reading your excellent article in the Astronomy magazine purchased in the UK(England)
My next question is why are you not teaching these subjects to people like me?
I left my education untill later on in life(eg now) because of circumstances and can now see why there is a shortage of physics people.
Ok. So I train people in weights running and some fighting skills(self defence that works, stuff) I dont suppose you would like to trade?
I could do with some starting point to basic physics that someone like me can understand? So have you written anything on a basic level? speak soon I hope.
Hi Shaun — Thanks for the note. I don’t have any basic physics articles to point to but the Astronomy articles are fairly accessible. You also might want to check out one I did for Sky&Telescope last year [Nov. 05] on basic cosmology. Good luck!