CALL ME SNAKE

A week or so ago, Scarlett Johansson graced the cover of PARADE Magazine, with a memorable quote beside her mug shot. (They’re always memorable, which is one of the many reasons I love the magazine and would not mind being stranded on a desert island if PARADE came once a week.) “I think I look like a boy” is what Johansson said (that might not be an exact quote, but it’s pretty darn close). I showed the cover to a friend who I know has the hots for the actress in question though she’s never done much for me personally. (I liked “Ghost World” and that’s about it.) “What do you think?” I asked him.

“What do I think?” he replied, staring at the cover with lust. “I think I’m a homosexual.”