CALL ME SNAKE

Two years ago, I wrote a post called “I HATE SNARKY,” which expressed my strong dislike for said adjective. “Call me a stick-in-the-mud, call me a curmudgeon, call me a jabbernow, but I hate the word ’snarky,’” I argued in April 2005. “I don’t know what it means and don’t want to know, though I sense it’s popular in ‘cyber’ circles…”

Well that was then and this is now. And now, in 2007, I still hate the term though I don’t think about it much. But I was reminded of it earlier this week when, out of the blue, I received a comment to that 2005 post from a “Random Internet Person” from Sacramento. His comment (I think it’s a him, though maybe I’m wrong) was good enough to warrant a coveted “Celebrity Guest Comment.” So Random Internet Person, whoever you may be, the balcony is now open. And the “conch” is now yours.

RANDOM INTERNET PERSON speaks: “You are way ahead of me. I have been hating this word only since about the middle of 2006. That’s when it seems to have burst on to the scene here in Sacramento. Mostly it’s on blogs, but it’s found its way into the newspaper.

“Mostly, I’ve found that, in the papers, it is used by the “society-type” reporters. The ones that report on the bar scene, the restaurant scene and the local media scene. I get the sense that they are very conscious of their own use of the word and that they congratulate themselves for being so hip when they throw it into a column. Sometimes I think that they sit around and create whole stories just so they can fit in that word.”

There is perhaps no greater honor in the blogosphere than to be granted a Celebrity Guest Column spot in Call Me Snake. Today I am pleased to announce that that honor goes to none other than myself, aka Snake, aka the Cambridge Guy, aka a Cambridge Kind of Guy. In response to notes by Windfall Woman and Turd Blossom re. John Kerry’s decision to pull out of contention for the 2008 race and questions about my own plans for elective office, I said the following (subject, of course, to editing): “You’re right, WFW. The whole Democratic Party is heaving a collective sigh of relief. Thanks for the note, TB. I’m not going to rule out anything. Nor am I going to rule in anything. In other words, I’m not ready to rule at this juncture. I’m going to spend some time with my family, talking and thinking (who ever thought with his family? Me, that’s who!), but not deciding. And definitely not ruling–in, out, or otherwise.”

As for the comments of Marco Polo (aka “Time Warp”), I had this to say: “Actually, ‘Time Warp,’ you’re half right: KERRY LOST TO W AFTER W LOST TO GORE.”

(EDITOR’S NOTE: Casting all false modesty aside, this is an example–a template if you will–of what an exchange in the blogosphere could and might look like if we all applied ourselves. Thanks, as always for your support. I could not have done it without you. I’d also like to thank my mother and father, without whom I could not have done it either…)

A friend of mine who’s a tough critic and a generally well-read fellow told me that yesterday’s post was “brilliant,” my “best ever.” It took me a minute to remember that the post he was referring to was one (related to George Bush and Groundhog Day) that I didn’t write at all, that I merely reprinted. One could, I suppose, take that as a backhanded compliment. But I prefer to think of it as a tribute to my editorial judgment. At least that’s what I keep telling myself. (Did I mention I have a fragile ego? The words “YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH!” are still reverberating inside my cranium, 15 years after Jack Nicholson first uttered them. But enough sputtering, enough Tuesday morning quarterbacking. I got a nice compliment, and let’s leave it at that.)